Dreading

18 Aug

So I am going away for Eid. Dreading leaving my sanctuary. Dreading having company for 48 hours straight. Dreading having to converse. Dreading all the questions people will be throwing at me about my life out of curiosity. Dreading having to sit in those social gatherings smiling awkwardly at the adults because I have nothing of importance to say to them and their humour goes over my head.

Dreading having to be face to face with distant cousins who were too quick to speak shit about me.. grrr… dreading also the awkwardness of having blocked him off of Facebook. Dreading  the possibility I lose my temper and break his nose. From what they tell me, I had made him cry several times when we were kids. I wouldn’t mind being at it again.

Dreading actually not socializing with people of interest for that matter. Dreading the fact that it is Eid means everyone I could IM would be too busy with their festivities. The fun ones. The ones out of my reach. With the people I know and care about. Would it be disrespectful if I am playing Words With Friends in the middle of an Eid party?

Okay, self. Chillax. It’s once in a blue moon kind of thing and you should be able to handle that. Come Monday night, you will be comfortably tucked in your own bed in your own room which by the way, you seem to have done a good job cleaning. Just a few weeks ago, you didn’t even know how to hold a broom or a mop. Look at you now! Go ahead and rub that in the face of people who find it highly amusing watching you clean like an amateur. As for your kitchen skills, oh well, one thing at a time.

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